There is something pretty magical about fall right? Watching the leaves go from green to orange. Watching them fall is a way that we can visibly watch the word go from summer to winter. And fall is beloved. With pumpkin patches and all things pumpkin flavored, Halloween and Thanksgiving, there's so much going on. It wouldn't make sense if we didn't have fall. If we went from 85 and sunny to 30 and snowing overnight- that's weird right? We find beauty and celebration in the transition. And thats a metaphor I needed to hear.
I have not blogged in a long time. But last time I talked on here I explained how in my first month of my career was going. I was facing struggles and learning how to work though those struggles and then I got to a point where things were easier. Story ideas were flowing, I had a better understanding of my camera and I finally got into a good flow of getting my work done in a way that made sense for me. So I was like... sweet, the hard part is over. Oh my god was I wrong. September was a rough month for me professionally. I felt like I was going backwards and every day I felt like I was drowning. But here is the thing, growing and learning and adapting is not a straight line and it forces us to appreciate those moments that feel like you're on top of the world. I am only 4 months in my CAREER, I am NOT going to be the most amazing journalist this early because I have so much learning still to do.
"Being a beginner doesn't mean you're bad at something, it means there is space to grow."
This is the most uncomfortable I have been in a moment of change because of how big the change is. Work was already a lot to take in and like normally, things are changing in my personal life. There's days where I just get frustrated beyond belief and wish I could just change things to how I want them to be. But it sadly doesn't work like that.
So lets go back to this fall metaphor. We celebrate fall, so why not celebrate our
own seasons of change? Now there is no way this is easy and I'm still learning how to do this myself. I was tired of coming home from work and crying because I was so stressed about the next day. Or starring at my phone wishing for people to reach out. I am celebrating by putting my focus else where when I can. I started reading a self help book, brought back making goals for myself and I even chopped all my hair off in an attempt to monument these moments. It's been going kinda well, and I'm proud of myself for not sitting around feeling pity for myself... anymore. Now I still have moments where I can't get out of my head, and I am still trying to figure that out. But positive steps forward will lead to nothing but positive change.
Our seasons of change are leading us to somewhere new, So the least we could do is try and enjoy the moment. It will make us appreciate where were going just a little bit more.
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